The Curious Case Of Porn And Masturbation

A man who says he doesn’t jerk off, either he is lying or he is lying. No escape. Men have no escape from this private practice of masturbatory orgasm. We make secret folders in which we keep playboy, porn videos, hustler and related stuff. You know what I mean.

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Now. I am not moralizing. Porn is not bad. Neither is rubbing yourself to ejaculate. No problem with that. But, there’s a catch. If anytime our habits drive us into any act of compulsion, then there seriously is something worth pondering over in our life. I have had my fair share of private practice in which I have rubbed out to many fantasy women. Many of whom never even knew who I was. No problem. I have seen enough of MILF and mature porn to get into fantasy mode while day dreaming in classroom, in bus, while lying in bed and everywhere else possible. Not to mention while being alone in bathroom. No problem.

But on January 15 I decided and pledged to not jerk off for the next three months. There was a TED talk by Gary Wilson on “Your Brain On Porn”. I saw that and my mind just blew off. It didn’t shame men for watching porn but did highlight an important issue. Issue of addiction. Porn can be easily accessed, anonymously accessed and that too for free! That’s what makes it more addictive than meth or cocaine. We have luxury of watching endless number of naked women of our choice in any position that we would like. Just at the click of mouse or the press of a key on our smartphone. Not to mention we can even have fake wonder woman fucking fake Spiderman! Or Robo-sex! Or pregnant-bondage-gagging-lesbian and what not!

What the mind can conceive, it can achieve. At least in categories of porn. That’s what is messing the minds of men (not so sure about non-men). The instant dose of dopamine and sexual gratification by the firm grip of hand, there in lies the problem. For more :-

Your brain on porn

I found through further research a community. It was NoFap. It had guys who don’t jerk off and wrote their feedback on reddit forum. They had serious issues like erectile dysfunction, sexual shame and severe social anxiety. They did their reboot. Reboot is the act of abstaining form PMO. Porn and Masturbatory Orgasm. Both included. Minimum time was for 90 days. I read their feedback and benefits and decided to get into my mission to not fap for 90 days straight. I became a fapstronaut. Fapstronaut is the guy who doesn’t indulge in PMO. Another of their terms.

From January 15 to April 15 I had no masturbation session and watched no porn. I read more than a dozen romance  and erotic novels but no visual stimulus for instant gratification. No porn. I experienced wet dreams during my abstinence period. 5 times. It had been years since I had felt my shorts wet with my seed clinging to my groins. Not a very pleasing experience but definitely worth having to get my mind reset.

What did I do in the time which got freed from PMO indulgence? Well,

  • I read more than three dozen (36) new books
  • Reread some of the old ones
  • Got back into my meditation practice
  • Began training for front lever and connected to Bar Brothers India
  • Build my website and wrote two short books
  • Attended more social events than what I would have imagined
  • Joined a writer’s group
  • Connected to more than a dozen new people who were not of my age
  • Donated blood for the first time in my life
  • Improved my social muscle and decreased social anxiety
  • Got my business cards printed
  • Gave more than 5 women hand-made gifts
  • Improved my vocal awareness
  • Felt more into my body than in my head
  • Got rid of more excessive rationalization
  • Surprisingly, my nails grew faster than before

My video on no fap experience

*For some reason youtube censored it. So I uploaded it on facebook!

So. The million dollar question arrives – “Will I ever jerk off ever again considering the benefits I got from abstaining from PMO?”. Honestly I won’t ever watch porn. Never. It fucks the mind to a shamelessly great extent. Just watch it enough to get the nitty gritty of sexual acts, practices, anatomy and techniques. But no more than that. Then the dopamine cycle begins all over. And I have long ago learned all of the above necessities. No more porn. Connection to real women is better than rubbing one out to Sasha Grey’s shaved pussy or Jenna Jameson’s hefty boobs. It just isn’t worth it. And the question still remains regarding masturbation. When I finished my 90 day reboot, not only I gave myself a pat on my back. But, I also gave a nice rub to my little soldier behind the closed door of my bathroom. Twice. It felt good. Not because it was done after a long time. But because it was not out of compulsion. It was out of sheer joy for getting back my mental muscles in shape.

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No Fap

What next? Another reboot? Yes of course.

I am a fucking fapstronaut. I won’t just let these benefits last this long. I’ll gain more out of abstaining from PMO. From 21 April to 21 November, there are 7 months. This time, the reboot is for 7 months. 210 days. And why 21 November? Its my birthday on 21 November. I’ll give myself the gift of completely healed up mind from the compulsive drive of watching porn and shooting a load in the name of  fantasy women.

* I have not watched porn for months but vulgar words and slangs still do come in my talk. Whether in person or in written. I’ll make a note to use them less and less and less from now onwards. Lets fuck the shit out of PMO! Oh, sorry! My bad. Now no more.

 

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